One day son asks his father”dad what is the difference between confident & confidential”? his father replied “Look here, you are my son, I am confident and your friend Johnny is also my son, that is confidential”
Dad: People this is unacceptable. You have to limit the use of the phone. I do not use this phone, I use the one at the office.
Mum: Same here, I hardly use this home telephone as I use my work telephone.
Son: Me too, I never use the home phone. I always use my company mobile.
Maid: So what is the problem? We all use our work telephones…
TEACHER: Willy, name one important thing we have today that we didn’thave ten years ago. WILLY : Me!
TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America. GEORGE : Here it is! TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? CLASS : George!
TEACHER: John, how do you spell “crocodile”? JOHN : “K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L” TEACHER: No, that’s wrong JOHN : Maybe it’s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
One sardarji professor asked a plumber to come to his college.
U know why?
Because he wanted to check from where the question paper was leaking…
Sardar: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre girl: sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status
Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.
Sardar built 2 Swimming Pools. And he left one of them unfilled. Why?
When asked, he said,
“Oye, that’s for those who don’t know Swimming.
A sardarji Doctor falls in Love with a Nurse.He writes a love letter to the Nurse :- I Love U sister…
Sardar: I think that girl is deaf..
Friend: How do U know?
Sardar: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals are new
Sardar: Miss, Did U call me on my mobile?
Teacher: Me? No, why?
Sardar: Yesterday I saw in my mobile- “1 Miss Call”.
Judge: Don’t U have shame? It is the 3rd time U R coming to court.
Sardar to judge: U R coming daily, don’t U have shame?
Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple?
Sardar: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE.
Sardar attending an interview in Software Company.
Manager: Do U know MS Office?
Sardar: If U give me the address I will go there sir.
Sardar in airplane going 2 Bombay ..
While its landing he shouts: ” Bombay … Bombay “
Air hostess says: “Be silent.”
Sardar: “Ok. Ombay. Ombay”
Sardar got an sms from his girl friend:
“I MISS YOU”
Sardarji replied:
“I Mr YOU” !!.
Sardar: Doctor! My Son swallowed a key
Doctor: When?
Sardar: 3 Months Ago
Dr: What were U doing till now?
Sardar: We were using duplicate key
Dr: So why did you come today?
Sardar: We lost the duplicate key!!
Why Sardar opens his lunch box in the middle of the road???
Just 2 confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office….
Son: papa, 4+3 kitne hain?
Sardar: ullu ke patthe, gadhe, idiot, naalaayak, besharam, tujhe kuch nahin aata? Jaa andar se CALCULATOR Le ke Aa..
After finishing MBBS Sardar started his practice.
He Checked 1st Patient’s Eyes, Tongue & Ears with a Torch & Finally Said:
“Oye, Torch is okay”
Teacher: “What is common between JESUS, KRISHNA , RAM, GANDHI and BUDHA?”
Sardar: “All are born on government holidays…!!!
FOR SALE: Complete Set of Britannica Encyclopaedia. Reason for Sale?? After getting Married, Wife Seems To KNOW EVERYTHING!!
Husband asks his wife “Darling, which movie we saw where the 1st hour was a total boring scene but the 2nd & 3rd hour was interesting??” Wife replies “Our Wedding Movie!
By Not Being No. 1, One Tends To Lose A Lot Of Things. One Such Example is Priority & Privilege
Hi. I’m probably home, I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you.
Answering Machine Saying: This is not an answering machine this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I’ll think about returning your call.
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian
I once prayed to god for a bike, but quickly found out he didnt work that way…so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness.
Do Not Disturb Already Disturbed
I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go for our anniversary?” She said,”Somewhere I have never been!” I told her,”How about the kitchen
Some sardars have a true streaks of genius. like this one.
Ek baar exam mein question tha,
“Challenge kise kehte hain?”
Sardarne saare paney khali chhod kar aakhri paney per likha..
“Apne baap ki aulaad hai to paas ker ke dikha.”
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OUR SARDAR ROCKS AGAIN
Some sardars have a true streaks of genius. like this one.
Sardar se poochha: Tum Agle Janam Mein Kya Ban Na Pasand Karoge? Why?
Sardar ke ghar achanak uske sasural wale aaye, biwi boli jao bahar se kuch Le kar aao. A Judge said: Order.. Order.. Order..
Sardar was sleeping & Teacher wakes him up. Teacher asks: “what did I say?”
Ek Sardar tha.. Uske paas ek Kawva(Crow) tha..
Sardar apne bete se Bola: Oye, Ghabra mat. Tu Sher DA puttar hai
TEACHER: you call your Mother as MUM. What will you call your Mother’s Younger Sister & Elder Sister?
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